Wednesday, September 17, 2008

All I wanted was to take a pee.....

Okay...I know I've mentioned on many other occasions how I will wake up ramdomly to one of my dogs vomiting in the bed or wake up to poo on the floor of the sunroom in the morning. Wel....let me just tell you about this morning....

As background - we are currently dog sitting our friends' pup Korby. Korby is the cute lil ball of fur who is 6 months old and a Pomeranian. Korby gets excited and piddles in little places all over my house. He's not used to living with other dogs so he gets all kinds of excited at random times of the day. Mostly it's at 6:30am when Shooter's leaving for work and I'm in the middle of getting ready and he's sitting on the bed. He pee'd on Shooter's side of the bed twice this week. Ugh. So last night Shooter decides that Korby will sleep on the floor rather than in the bed with us. Suits him fine as he'll sleep about anywhere.

So - about 4:00am this morning I get up to go pee and shuffle my way to the bathroom because I certainly don't want to step on lil Korby. I take two steps into the bathroom and scream, "Holy Sh*t!" I land on the toilet and then mumble, "Yep, that's a pretty good assessment. Damn dog." Shooter wakes up and says, "What's the problem?" I'm still sitting in the dark mind you - "I just stepped in Korby's crap!" He gets up and turns on the light, and believe me, that did nothing to improve my disposition. We then notice that cute lil Korby has pee'd in the bathroom too...I think my pretty blueish-greenish rugs remind him of the great outdoors. Shooter and I fight our gag reflexes to clean up the poo - let me tell you, my gag reflex is darn hard to fight at 4am.

We get everyone settled and I head back to bed and as I am crawling under the covers I look at my pillow. I just stand there and stare for a few seconds and Shooter asks me what's wrong. I'm all like, just look - would you? He looks and starts to laugh, hysterically mind you. Apparently while all the drama was unfolding in the bathroom over Korby's lack of bodily control, Morey decided that he was so traumatized and couldn't believe we'd held back on the vomiting that he'd vomit for us. Yup, folks, he laid a big old pile of vomit right on my pillow. All I could say was that I was glad it wasn't my favorite expensive pillow.

Side note - I mentioned to Shooter I was glad it wasn't my favorite pillow because I was going to have to throw that one away. He was all like, why do you have to throw it away? I just looked at him like he had three heads. I asked him if he'd sleep on it after Moe had thrown up all over it, and he said that he guessed he understood. Geesh....men....

Anyway....the god's were conspiring to make this a day where I vomited, I could tell. I don't vomit...I haven't vomited in almost two years...since that fateful Halloween night two years ago. I have a Seinfeld like streak that I refuse to break.

Okay...I gotta run and sip some ginger ale and eat Saltines...I've made myself nauseaous just writing this post....good luck reading it...

Later lovelies!
L.


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edit

Here is a picture of the pup who is a constant thorn in my side, er, I mean loveliest houseguest ever. (please excuse the demon eyes, my blackberry doesn't seem to know how to not make everyone look possessed)


8 comments:

Bekah said...

ugh wow. what a morning you had!

Bogart in P Towne said...

you are a saint for dog sitting like that...

calicobebop said...

I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry. Nobody needs that level of poop/pee/vomit drama at 4am when they have to pee.

I have to admit that I laughed though. Laughed and laughed and laughed. So, I'm sorry once again for laughing at your pain. :)

Di said...

Dude....

I have the answer now. OMG, ewe you pillow and awwww to poor Mo. I can understand the pain of that.

BTW- I laughed out loud too- HARD !

for a different kind of girl said...

Um...gah!!

You've had a fine how do you do kind of morning!

Vanessa said...

I'm sorry you had a bad morning and that really was bad, but I can't help laughing. On you pillow? Good thing they're cute, huh?

the cubicle's backporch said...

I hate to say it, but I laughed. I know what it's like to step in dog shit in the middle of the night, but to go back to your bed and find a big puddle of puke? I couldn't help it. Just the mental picture had me laughing!!!

whitney said...

HAHAHAHAHA! that's why my dogs, or any visiting dogs sleep in a crate if they can't hold in bodily functions. I SO don't clean that up well. My gag reflex is nonexistent.