The moments you cherish

Yesterday, when I got home from work, Shooter decided that he didn't want to mess up the kitchen and that we were going out to dinner. P had fallen asleep in the car on the way home from daycare so that worked out just fine - he napped on the way home and then to the restaurant and rejuvenated when we arrived.

We had a great dinner....P having his evening meal and snacking on some crackers, cookies and french fries. I so enjoy that time together.

When we got home, Shooter and I both realized that we HAD NO MORE FORMULA MIX!!!!! Which is enough to strike paralyzing fear in the hearts of the most manly of men. So Shooter ran out to get some more formula and I had some precious alone time with my lil man.

He loves to play chase. He'll crawl a few feet away from you and then roll onto his butt and look at you, grin, then turn and crawl a bit more. He'll keep doing that until you come chasing after him saying, "Ima gonna git youuu!". He keeps cackling and then starts crawling like a man on a mission - his lil but just wiggling back and forth - sticking out his leg in his modified crab crawl. I catch him in my bedroom and we play with our mirror and then the door (the kid has this incomprehensible fascination with doors) and then I go sit at the foot of the bed on the floor with my knees up just watching him.

I'm fascinated by how much he can do now. How tall he has grown. What he notices. How he learns. After a bit...he crawls over to me....crawls up between my knees and leans his head over on me.

Can I tell you that I died a thousand deaths right then and there??????

I pulled the lil guy up to give him a big hug and he puts his arms on my shoulders and rests his cheek on my shoulder.

Does life get much better than that? I think not.

He then wanted down and play some more and then would crawl back over and we'd snuggle a little more. He was getting tired and each time would linger on my shoulder a little longer. By then Shooter had gotten back home and it was time to get him in bed. Shooter's time with P is the snuggle time right before we put him in bed. P seems to do better when Shooter puts him to bed than when I do it.

Oh....and the kid went from hysterical to silent in 90 seconds. Amazing!

This motherhood gig is hard. Every day I feel like I make choices and decisions that are HUGE. I feel like everything has the potential to either benefit or hurt P. I know that's not really the case....but I have a heavier sense of responsibility now.

All in all, it's been a wonderful, crazy, tearful, joyous, funny, messy ride and I can't wait to enjoy many many more years of it!

Well...I stand corrected....

Well, ladies and gentlemen....I stand corrected.

In my last post I mentioned that my son was a vomiter. And he was. Up until the day or two after I wrote that post.

**rolls eyes**

At P's one year check-up the pediatrician told me that I had to start putting him down before he was fully asleep so that he could learn to put himself down. Yes, I'd been putting off doing that because I KNEW my kid. I KNEW what he'd do. I KNEW he'd throw up everywhere and well, I just didn't want to deal with it. Also, he's in this very clingy phase and just wants to hug on me and put his head on my shoulder....and....well, crap, I KNOW!! I know what I had to do....

So that night, we tried it....but he went to sleep on Shooter and we had no drama. He woke up, however at 2am and would not go back down. At 5am I laid him in his crib and walked out of his room...I was done...this kid was going to get the hang of this one way or another....

He cried....hysterically cried....sobbed....gagged.....but didn't vomit.

He cried...hysterically.....for over 45 minutes before the sobs got farther apart and he began to lose steam.

Ya know...I didn't think it was physically possible for a kid to cry so long....I am exhausted after 10 minutes of crying...anyway, I digress...

Night #2 - the crying went on for about 20-25 minutes...and I made Shooter be the bad guy and go put P down. After 10 min Shooter went back in to make sure he had his paci and try to settle him down...that just made things worse! Finally about 15 min later he crashed.

Night #3 - attended a birthday party and the kid was so exhausted that he put up no fight and was out almost instantly.

Night #4 - The decision was made to not keep going in his room unless it sounded like he had vomited everything he'd eaten that day or fell out of the crib. Amazingly enough...he cried for less time....only 15 min!

Night #5 - I was making Shooter and I some hot dogs in the kitchen. As soon as I finished them and had dressed my dogs, Shooter went to go put P in bed. I sat down, Shooter dressed his dogs and then sat down......and then we realized.....no crying! It had to have been only 5 min and he was completely spent like a couple of nights ago!! A-MAZ-ING!! This might actually be working after all!

Night #6 - The poor kid was so tired after day care. Got him home, played with him for a bit, fed him a little dinner, got him a bath, played a little more, then bottle. He zonked out on me before i knew it! BUT - as Shooter was taking him to bed he woke up and started wailing as soon as his butt hit the bed. We had bout 15 min of sporadic bursts of crying...like he'd figure out he was alone in his room in the dark and get really mad....then pass out.....then wake up and be mad again....then pass out....rinse and repeat....

Tonight marks the one week mark and I think we've made significant progress! It's definitely nicer for me because I'm not tethered to the couch with the munchkin curled up on my chest. Now granted...I LOVE that....but every so often I'd like to surf the net, or fold laundry, or bake cupcakes.....something....anything.....

There is hope.....

Now....if we can just conquer the sippy cup.......

What do those books say?

Okay....I have FINALLY come to the place where I fully believe that my child isn't like any of the children that the authors of the parenting books based their theories from.

You see.....my son is a vomiter.

I have tried the Ferber method...or the cry it out...or the let them soothe themselves and put themselves to sleep strategy. He HATES being left alone in his crib and will cry - well, let me be more descriptive - he will scream and sob and work himself up into such a tizzy that he ends up projectile vomiting all down the front of the crib. In the process he ruins his sheets, the rail cover, the mesh bumper and the dust ruffle.

Can I tell you just how much I HATE changing the sheets on his crib? I work up more of a sweat doing that than I do when I actually work out....and I hardly remember what that's like.

I have basically determined that my son is one who has a hard time putting himself to sleep. He needs help. Maybe I created that monster....but it's where we are now. Ever since he was little he'd cry himself into vomiting so we assisted him in getting to sleep.

Now, you just have to let him go for 3-4 min and he'll be technicolor yawning all over the place. I'm not looking forward to the terrible two's....because if he can do this now....without really trying....what if he realizes that he can make himself do it and does it on purpose.

Have I mentioned that I have a SERIOUS aversion to vomit?

I'm really at a loss....I had a bit of a breakdown this morning....after we'd been fighting with him for 3 hours - he'd fall asleep in your arms - then as soon as you got up from the chair he'd wake up crying. I'm not proud of it....I'm very ashamed of it....but honestly...I'm at my wits end. We're a bit sleep deprived....he's tired....we're all a bit cranky....we're just not all that pleasant to be around honestly.

Here's to hoping that this rough patch is merely a speed bump in our road of blissful sleep....we've been doing well until the last week....but oh what a week it's been....

I should blog about that.

Can I just say that it feels pretty awesome to be feeling like I want to blog again.

For most of the last 6 months I haven't even thought of blogging....I read others' blogs....posted on some....but just couldn't bring myself to write anything.

Lately...like in the last week....I've caught myself thinking, "Now I should blog about that!". I consider that a kind of breakthrough of sorts.

Perhaps I will start blogging again....random stuff....kid stuff....embarrassing stuff...ya know, the typical blog material.

Until I can compose my next masterpiece....Ciao!