Saturday, September 27, 2008

Someone send relief now....Pepto might work....

Okay....It's 7:45am on a Saturday morning and instead of sleeping in my nice warm bed I'm up and awake and have been for almost an hour. I was rudely awakened from my delicious slumber by my husband and the tunes of the most handsome and virile Bono (yes, Vertigo is my phone ringtone). I truly wouldn't have minded being awakened by Bono singing in my ear....but I digress.

For some reason unknown to me, the city of Atlanta and all surrounding counties are being affected by a serious gas shortage. Luckily I haven't had to visit the gas station while things have been at their worst as I don't have to drive far to pick up the commuter bus that takes me into the city. Shooter, however, got up bright and spanking early to go to work and called me to notify me that the gas station about 1.5 miles from our house had just gotten in a new supply of petrol and I needed to slap on a baseball cap and a bra and head down there.

Well, that's the way to get me going in the morning! Talk to me like that more often and things will get steamy fast.

So I jump up....grab a ball cap, a bra, jeans, sweatshirt and flipflops and flounce my way down to the local gas station. Me and about half the town it seems. Actually it wasn't that bad...I had filled up both of my cars in about 25 min which isn't bad considering I had to drive, wait, fill up, drive to house, drive to gas station, wait, fill up and drive home.

I am actually pretty darn fed up with whatever is going on. How bad is it that you have to get up at 7am to go and get gas? We tried to get some last night but the lines were so bad we decided to wait until after we'd eaten dinner. By the time we finished our lovely sushi dinner the gas had run out.

Hurricane Ike was...what....2 or 3 weeks ago? How come we're the only city in the Southeast experiencing these problems? Why can't people get their crap together and get us the gas we need. I will say this....I'm darn glad I drive low end cars that only take Regular gas. The people that drive those high-falutin' fancy engine cars are all shit-outta luck because hardly any stations are carrying any octane higher than Regular. Thanks Mazda, Nissan and Honda for making cars for the regular kinda folks.

Anyway....if you can send Pepto for our gas stations, I'd appreciate it.

Later lovelies!
L.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Football and the Southern Belle

One thing you should know about me is that I am a complete football fanatic. I grew up in a Southern city that is home of a nationally recognized football program. I blood runneth Orange has often been a saying in our house. My father went to the University in our city...as did his brother...as did my cousin...and my other cousin....and my other cousin....but I bucked the tradition and went to a smaller school away from home. I mention that tradition only so that you get the idea that being a fan of this nationally recognized program is an all-consuming thing.

I learned very early on that if I wanted to watch TV (other than the Mull's Singing Convention) on Sunday morning, I had to watch ESPN gameday updates. I learned about the spread offense, the nickel defense and what the shotgun was. I learned about the greatest rivalries and coaches with the most amazing and revolutionary coaching skills. I learned about tight ends (Hallelujah for football pants!) and wide receivers and cornerbacks and blitzes. I learned how to tell when there'd been pass interference and to always expect that our team would get a block in the back penalty on a kick return. I learned that fans of our football team didn't accept mediocrity. We'd rahter pull a moving van up in front of your house or notify the newspaper that your house was for sale if we decided we were ready to see you vacate the city.

It's very safe to say that my Father equipped me with such amounts of football knowledge that I was able to get a few dates sheerly because I loved to watch a good game. I could analyze with the best of my guy friends.

Now, I am - always have been - always will be - a fan of the Tennessee Volunteers. Unfortunately, right now we're suffering from a lack of good coaching and individual talent that makes for a really rough season. After our very sad performance and subsequent dismemberment by the Florida Gators on Saturday, I officially decided that I am cheering for the Georgia Bulldogs this season. This doesn't negate the fact that I am and always will be a Tennessee fan. Oh No! My blood will always runneth Orange. I just will probably wear more red and black this year than I normally would have.

An event like this has only happened one other time in my reasonably short life. Once upon a time, I was a young girl in college - approximately 18 years of age - and I decided that I had fallen out of love with my dear Volunteers. I decided that I so despised Johnny Majors (then coach of my beloved Volunteers) that I was going to become a fan of the Notre Dame Fighting Irish until he was fired and replaced. I had several Notre Dame sweatshirts that I wore every weekend and I championed them fervently. I would come home and shout their victories from the deck of my parents home and proclaim their greatness. No one really care in Tennessee about a football team in Indiana, but I was not deterred! Eventually Johnny Majors was replaced - by one fateful coach, Mr. Philip Fulmer - who is the currently detested coach of my beloved Volunteers.

I do not hold much hope for what this football season will bring...as far as the Vols are concerned....however, I will watch as much football as possible in search of good coaches instructing talented kids who play hard and want to win. I will watch Alabama in awe - but not like it. I will watch Georgia and cheer. I will watch USC and continue to believe that they can beat most NFL teams right now. I will watch Notre Dame and gag. I will watch all SEC teams and cheer my hardest. But I cannot be the fervent fan I used to be when it comes to the mighty Volunteers.

The mighty have fallen - and they forgot to wear their LifeAlert necklace...

Later lovelies!
L.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Ahhh...geez....they come home when?

Today was such a good day - it started with a lazy morning sleeping in. We had originally thought that we'd get up and go to our favorite breakfast place but it didn't work out that way - which is perfectly fine with me.

Korby, our Pomeranian houseguest, is still peeing in random places throughout the house, but no more poops, thank goodness!

This morning he pee'd on the bathroom rug and I looked at Shooter and said, "His parents are coming home when?" We have enjoyed having him but we are certainly not used to having a puppy in the house.

We ended up getting a call from our groomer offering us a discount on grooming for Moe and Leah - we jumped at it and took them off to get all prettied up.

I then went to have my cherry blossom tattoo finished and boy does it look good. I can't wait to see how the colors pop once it's healed...here it is below:




We're now off to pick up the pups and grab a pizza for dinner...good times...and Korby's going back to his home for a while....whew!
Later lovelies!
L.h

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

All I wanted was to take a pee.....

Okay...I know I've mentioned on many other occasions how I will wake up ramdomly to one of my dogs vomiting in the bed or wake up to poo on the floor of the sunroom in the morning. Wel....let me just tell you about this morning....

As background - we are currently dog sitting our friends' pup Korby. Korby is the cute lil ball of fur who is 6 months old and a Pomeranian. Korby gets excited and piddles in little places all over my house. He's not used to living with other dogs so he gets all kinds of excited at random times of the day. Mostly it's at 6:30am when Shooter's leaving for work and I'm in the middle of getting ready and he's sitting on the bed. He pee'd on Shooter's side of the bed twice this week. Ugh. So last night Shooter decides that Korby will sleep on the floor rather than in the bed with us. Suits him fine as he'll sleep about anywhere.

So - about 4:00am this morning I get up to go pee and shuffle my way to the bathroom because I certainly don't want to step on lil Korby. I take two steps into the bathroom and scream, "Holy Sh*t!" I land on the toilet and then mumble, "Yep, that's a pretty good assessment. Damn dog." Shooter wakes up and says, "What's the problem?" I'm still sitting in the dark mind you - "I just stepped in Korby's crap!" He gets up and turns on the light, and believe me, that did nothing to improve my disposition. We then notice that cute lil Korby has pee'd in the bathroom too...I think my pretty blueish-greenish rugs remind him of the great outdoors. Shooter and I fight our gag reflexes to clean up the poo - let me tell you, my gag reflex is darn hard to fight at 4am.

We get everyone settled and I head back to bed and as I am crawling under the covers I look at my pillow. I just stand there and stare for a few seconds and Shooter asks me what's wrong. I'm all like, just look - would you? He looks and starts to laugh, hysterically mind you. Apparently while all the drama was unfolding in the bathroom over Korby's lack of bodily control, Morey decided that he was so traumatized and couldn't believe we'd held back on the vomiting that he'd vomit for us. Yup, folks, he laid a big old pile of vomit right on my pillow. All I could say was that I was glad it wasn't my favorite expensive pillow.

Side note - I mentioned to Shooter I was glad it wasn't my favorite pillow because I was going to have to throw that one away. He was all like, why do you have to throw it away? I just looked at him like he had three heads. I asked him if he'd sleep on it after Moe had thrown up all over it, and he said that he guessed he understood. Geesh....men....

Anyway....the god's were conspiring to make this a day where I vomited, I could tell. I don't vomit...I haven't vomited in almost two years...since that fateful Halloween night two years ago. I have a Seinfeld like streak that I refuse to break.

Okay...I gotta run and sip some ginger ale and eat Saltines...I've made myself nauseaous just writing this post....good luck reading it...

Later lovelies!
L.


---------------------

edit

Here is a picture of the pup who is a constant thorn in my side, er, I mean loveliest houseguest ever. (please excuse the demon eyes, my blackberry doesn't seem to know how to not make everyone look possessed)


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My weird quirks, anxieties and compulsions (Part I)

I don't know exactly what compelled me to start writing this - perhaps it was the conversation I had with my Mom or with my BFF Di. I am weird. I figured that out a long time ago. Honestly, I surround myself with other pretty weird folks too. I've determined in my old age...ha!...that being weird is pretty darn cool. I certainly wouldn't have admitted that many years ago...say in high school...but I can certainly admit it now.


I have many weird quirksZ, anxieties and compulsions. Some people might call them normal - because they experience them - and others may look at them as completely strange and incomprehensible. I have decided to pull back the blinds on my weirdness and expose it to the light....in all it's quirky weird glory.


The first weird quirky thing that comes to mind is how I used to lay in bed as a child - and by child I'd say that it was mostly in my pre-teen and teenage years - and pretend that I'd been in a horrific car accident and was completely paralyzed. I'd pretend to lay there unconscious while people came and visited me. They'd cry and stay with me and read to me. I'd pretend that I wanted to talk to them but couldn't. I used to imagine that everyone who'd ever done anything wrong to me would come to my bedside and apologize and cry because of what they'd done. Mostly I'd pretend that my handsome boyfriend would insist on staying by my bedside and would declare his unending love for me.

It wasn't always a car accident, sometimes I would have broken my neck in a diving accident or I would fallen off a horse.

I always remember focusing on the people coming to see me and that they were so sorry and sad and were always telling me how much they loved me. The boyfriend was always part of it too.

I am sure that somewhere there's a psychiatrist who would have a field day with this.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Did you say 15 Twinkies!?!?!?

I found a very interesting article online the other day. It's an article in Men's Health on the 20 most unhealthy drinks out there.

http://www.menshealth.com/eatthis/Unhealthiest_Drinks_in_America/index.php

Let's just say that the top 5 all top 1,000 calories and the top 2 are over 2,000 calories. I had a terribly hard time picking my jaw up off the floor....

===============================

My first big event in my new role at work was Tuesday evening. I planned a dinner for 35 at a local upscale Mexican restaurant. The food was good, the service was reasonable, the restaurant was breathtaking - the Guacamole was TO DIE FOR!!!!! Somehow I have to figure out how to nicely render my constructive criticism to the events manager. There are several things that would have to change if I were to go back there again. I have to relay that kind of news. *sigh*

================================

Work is hard right now....just lots of stuff going on and I'm having a hard time dealing with it. Hopefully it'll all right itself soon enough.

================================

Can I tell ya just how much I miss my husband - I think we live in the same house but I'm not sure. I think we've spoken over the last few days, but again I'm not sure. We've both been running ragged at work and I'm ready to slow down a bit...I know he is too. Dear Shooter's employer...bring him back to EP so I can get my hubby back. Thanks!

================================

Did anyone else have a hard time yesterday? It doesn't seem like 7 years have passed - my heart aches when I see the pictures and hear the stories.

================================

Later lovelies!
L.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Who told you that you were funny?

Okay....I admit that I watched the MTV VMAs last night. Well, actually, let me correct myself - I tore myself away from my work and watched Britney fumble her way through the opening remarks (and geez, someone show her how to hold a freakin' microphone wouldya?) and then half listened to the British idiot known as Russell Brand make a complete a freakin' fool of himself (I mean seriously - how many times can you make the Jonas Brothers the object of a joke in a two minute monologue?) and then watched Rihanna's pretty good opening song. I then mumbled about how stupid and retarded Russell Brand was and moaned something about how he can't even speak correctly (it's THink you idiot! Fink means something entirely different over here!). I heard Shooter gripe periodically about the performances as he half paid attention to it. I ended up falling asleep and he stayed up to watch Christina Aguilera. I'm so glad I didn't....that was one of the WORST lip syncing performances EVER in the HISTORY of MUSIC!!!!! I wonder how much time she put into preparing...even Britney does better than that!

Personally I was glad to see that the entire crowd wasn't behind Brand (as he obviously thought they would be) when he went on his Bush rant. See, Russell, it's like this - I can talk bad about my family but the minute you talk bad about them it's ON LIKE DONKEY KONG. His attempt at coming over to America and bashing our government didn't quite go over like he had hoped.

MTV...I hope you learned your lesson....

===========================

I so want Guitar Hero for my Wii. Shooter and I were at the Wal-Marts yesterday and for once it wasn't be hogged by some 10 yr old pre-acne twerp and I was able to try it out. I LOVE IT!!!!! I played one of the easiest of the easy songs but I was hooked. I tried using my puppy dog eyes on Shooter and it didn't work. I tried say pretty please with sugar on it and using puppy dog eyes and he stood like a rock. I tried hugging up to him as innocently as possible in the Wal-Mart but he held firm. I was about to launch into a tantrum but reigned myself in. I'll get it...and soon. I promise you!

===========================

The final kitten found a home. I took it to my boss' house on Saturday and it will now be living there with two beautiful girls to take care of it. If it's a girl it's name will be Sophie and if a boy it'll be named Sebastian. Both beautiful names for a beautiful kitten.

============================

Well....off to do some work....

Later lovelies,
L.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Overheard - in the middle of the night....

Two nights ago, at approximately 3:30am ET the following conversation took place:

Me: *wakes up a bit, wrinkles nose, determines one of the dogs farted, shakes head, goes back to sleep*
Shooter: *wakes up a bit, wrinkles nose* What the hell is that smell???
Me: Who? What? Fell? Who fell? Did you fall out of bed?
Shooter: Smell!! Smell that? What is that?
Me: Oh. I smelled it too. I think one of the dogs farted.
Shooter: Dude...that's no fart. That plain smells like ass.
Me: *lifts the covers to find Morey* Son of a.....I'm gonna kill that dog. *Spies a big pile of dog vomit on the sheet next to her*
Shooter: Ha! At least it's on your side this time.
Me: Yea, and he's lucky I didn't roll over - he'd be looking for another home. He's walking a thin line as it is.
Shooter: Here let me get you a towel.
Me: I have one right here...just waiting for the opportunity to mop up one of his stanky butt piles of vile vomit.
Shooter: Oh well...we needed to wash the sheets anyway...
Me: *rolls eyes* Whatever...get the comforter, I'm too tired to find another sheet.





I love my dogs....I really do.....if I keep repeating it I'll believe it.

---------------------


Oh....and yesterday (while I was working from home) I rescued three kittens from my backyard. They're adorable and one is still at home with me. I kinda wanna keep it...but kinda don't. I haven't decided. Here are pics of them.









I have this little guy at home right now. He's so cute and such a snuggler...they all were actually. The dogs just don't know what to make of them being in the house though. It was a crazy day.

Later lovelies!

L.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Wordless Wednesday - Boomsday '08


Now that I've actually been out taking some pictures...here's a photo of the Knoxville skyline on Sunday evening during their annual Boomsday celebration.